Survival strategies

Survival strategies come in all shapes and forms. 
They can be something like a full blown “unhealthy addiction” to drugs, alcohol or “healthy addictions” such as obsession with clean diet, exercising etc... 

On a more subtle level we can find survival strategies in relationships, the need for having partners, constantly jumping to a new relationship straight after break ups. 

Working hard is another popular one. Achieving big, so that we can find some value in ourselves. 

Eating is another common one, a big one for me. 

Self appointed missions. Making ourselves feel useful, purposeful and with the additional satisfaction of feeling we are saving others. 

“Spirituality” was one of my biggest survival strategies. It was the centre point of my life. Coming from the new age and other forms of ungrounded spirituality, I spent decades searching for meaning and purpose. A distraction from feeling my own emotions and looking at the buried pain inside. Not to mention that many of the practices and teachings I got involved with enhanced my dissociation and disconnection from my body. 

All survival strategies are valid. They are unconscious attempts of survival. They were formed to help you cope with something difficult. Without them you wouldn’t be here reading this post. So although these survival strategies have outgrown themselves and are no longer helpful, it’s important to realise that it’s ok and feeling guilty for having them is counterproductive. 

Trauma integration connects these missing pieces. It helps you land back in your body. 

Once the survival strategies start to fall away you finally start reconnecting with your Healthy Self, which was covered up by these coping mechanisms. 

This work is pragmatic, grounded work, but it’s what will bring you back to reality. Dropping all illusions and finally seeing the true beauty of life, the joy of living and finding true connection with others.